Puzzles of Glory

"Truly I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you."  Matthew 17:20

I was watching a Ted Talk today of Jared Diamond talking on the collaspe of societies.  I have seen it before, but this time something caught my ears.  He was not talking about God, but I heard the Lord say through him: "there is no problem in the world that a great creator cannot solve."  Recently Will bought me a beautiful puzzle as a count down to wedding gift.  I love puzzles: looking through the hundreds of broken pieces to make a big and whole picture.  I often feel I am a 1000 piece puzzle that can never be put together.  I forget again and again that I have a creator that will make me whole and confident in him.  He sees the big picture and is working to make that picture come together through his ability.  I am just a 1000 puzzle pieces with no power to be made right without my great creator.  The Lord is calling me a greator amount of faith in him.  Faith is all I have because my actions will lead to an even greater amount of puzzle pieces.  I do not have to be anything special, but only clay in the potter's hands.  The greatest things ever done on earth have been done by the most ordinary people.  Jesus' disciples were ordinary people.  I find confidence in this during a time with so many problems and tasks surrounding me.  When forgiveness seems like an impossible problem- the great creator can build it in me (Colossians 3:13).  When having worldly wisdom seems so much easier than living under the wisdom of above - the great creator can transform me (James 3:13-18).  When anxieties overtake my life - the great creator brings piece to the storm (Matthew 17:7).

Ecuador

This past week I went to Ecuador with almost 40 juniors, seniors, and adults from my church.  We put on a youth camp for three churches to come to and we got the blessing of baptizing over 20 new Christians.  A lot of my prayer and reason for going was for the people from my youth group.  I spent a lot of time with Ecuadorians, but I was also was intentional with many conversations with Americans as they inevitably wrestled with the question of is God calling me to a life in this plentiful harvest?  I got so fired up seeing this come to play and am praying that those I talked to would chase after the heart and will of God and not be scared of giving it all to him who is worthy of more than it all.

            I heard so many heartbreaking testimonies in Ecuador and now more that ever am so thankful for my testimony.  I pray I never take my background for granted.  Also that as I continue to hear many of these extensive and crazy testimonies that I do not ever think mine is nothing and forget where God has brought me from.  How nasty my heart was, and how he is now breaking and molding into his new and beautiful creation. 

            So much of what God was doing last week was teaching the Ecuadorians the difference between joy and happiness.  How in Christ no matter the circumstances we have the fullness of joy!  This is a huge passion of mine and I loved getting to share my testimony, talk, and pray with different people about this subject.  Another big thing I got to talk with girls about is relationships.  South America has such a need for people to teach them about the freedom that is in Christ and also about what Christian relationships should look like. 

Update!!

If anybody reads this I wanted to give a little update! haha I have gotten so much more intentional about every conversation I have with missionaries because if this class and I wish I could have written it all down! It is like everywhere I turn God has more missionaries around me that I can learn so much from and it has been so fun!:) I have been reading Hudson Taylor, but have been distracted with preparing to teach the 3^rd grade about Africa lately.  I just presented to them and am now blogging about my trip to Ecuador last week and then will continue to keep reading.  I feel like I have so much in common with Hudson and have loved reading about his heart, challenges, and ministry.  Last week in Ecuador I met a rare Ecuadorian who has a huge passion for missions and was about to leave for China.  We go to talk about the same things that God had been teaching us in different continents but the same God!:) Some stuff we chatted about was our testimonies, callings, Isaiah 49, and Hudson Taylor.  So coolJ

More contacts!

This weekend I met with two different missionaries and it was so good!!  The first was Sara Lux whom is a missionary in China but came home for a few days!  We talked about unreached people groups, pre-missions college stuff, and her work in China.  I’m excited about this new contact to ask any future questions too!  It was super good to hear about how God’s glory is being spread through the nations.  I have also been frequently meeting with many missions’ people at my church asking them an annoying amount of questions.  Yesterday one person I met with was AJ Kalmykov who was a missionary in Russia.  I realized how very similar we were and it was so good talking to her about this area of the world I think I might be called to and just other random stuff.  It was really cool hearing how God had led her through her life and how she is continuing to follow him during this season of stateside ministry.  I have met with my friend Vanessa many times lately talking about majors, international housing, and other international stuff at OU.  I am about to start a book on Hudson Taylor and I am so excited about it!:)  

Belgium!

             My church is adopting an unreached people group and this past week they sent a group of five others and I to go check out where we felt God was calling us.  We went to Brussels, Belgium with original concentration on the Moroccan immigrants there.  Just the legal immigrants make up 26% of the population and it is quickly rising.  But we soon realized we wanted to adopt the entire city.  It is a city of people groups and I am so excited about what God is doing there.  Multiple churches have recently been called to go and plant churches and the believers there are so faithful in such darkness!

            We did lots of prayer walking to seek what God has for us there and ask him to move in Brussels.  Also we distributed Bibles in the market places.  We visited all the American missionaries in the city and went to various churches.  Visiting with all these different believers and missionaries was very insightful for my present and my future.  The small but faithful churches were so inspiring! I realized more how much short-term missions is not my passion but going, living with the people, becoming apart of their culture, and making disciples! I cannot think of anything else I could ever do with my life but go to the unreached people groups and tell them about Jesus! 

            Also we had lots of meetings to combine different ministry opportunities we were each seeing.  We went to a couple of different youth groups and I loved seeing the youth packed in a small room- out numbered on the streets but overflowing the room.  Some of them bused 2 hours to get there.  God did a lot of work while we were at the youth groups and it was definitely one of my favorite parts of the trip.  For the first time God was able to use my education to discuss literature and stuff as tool that He has armed me with to share his light to all the nations.  It was also my first cold and European mission trip.

Highlight 1:

            We also did some work in a couple of different food banks.  The first food bank we went to was a part of a Congolese church that has this ministry of typically just giving people food and then they leave.  But because we came they wanted to try something new.  They actually invited all these people into the church to wait for their food with soup, coffee, and tea.  My friends Lucy and Nate led worship and then Lucy and I told our testimonies.  We both felt that it was probably bad because we didn’t even remember what we had said but we came to find out the Holy Spirit had just talked through us! The pastor kept talking about how simple and clear it was! Total God move!!  I realized how much my testimony of coming out of a bit of depression in Middle School to the fullness of joy in Christ is such a big thing for the people of Brussels to hear and I would love to go back and tell more people!! Here is the email I sent home describing the event: 

            Oh my goodness!!! I can't contain my joy when I get to see God working in the nations especially in Europe where it's not expected!! The spirit moved so so so much today you could just feel it!! Just like God told me He would in Jeremiah 1 and Isaiah 49 He used me in to bring His glory to the nations and it was totally not me!! I got to share my testimony with tons of Muslim women and children today as we let them come out of the cold to wait for their free food! Haha some people wouldn't come into a church but it was a breath-taking site to see all these veiled women in this church with a huge cross!! We did worship songs, which none of them had heard anything like and told people it was so beautiful not knowing the glory filled words that were being sung! Then what happened next shocked them so much that they unexpectantly stopped what they were doing and intently paid attention- 2 young educated women got up and full of the spirit started talking to them about what Jesus was and has done in their lives! You could just feel the spirit planting seeds and the Belgium believers were so shocked about it like they were like you don't understand how big all this is to have Muslims in a church and to have them listen and one girl from the Congo (Brussels in like NYC with all the different nationalities I love it!! Haha) got up, grabbed the mike and started talking to me in French and I was so caught off guard and had no idea what she was saying so they translated that she was asking me for tips for teenagers here in Belgium to find joy because depression and suicide are so high here probably cause of all the rain she was like what did you do?? I don't even know what I said I just prayed real fast and let God speak through me and I’m so fired up about all that God is going to do in this city and am honored to get to be a part of it!! Mike warned us he has never left Europe encouraged but I'm so encouraged and filled and ready for what all else God has I store!! I wanted to share with you guys what happened today!:) Thanks for praying!!

Highlight 2:

            Another food bank we went to was more advanced in their ministry.  They definitely are in need of some younger workers cause all the workers were old.  Their joy was so radiant and they had their minds set on things above and not on earth.  It was an honor getting to work with them.  I got to tell my testimony at this food bank also and met a 12 and 14-year-old girls who are new Christians and have to hide their faith from their Muslim family.

Highlight 3:

            Another highlight was going to the big, Vatican City like mosque of Belgium.  We thought that as girls we were going to have to kind of sneak in with a head covering and stuff but the opposite happened.  We told them we were a group studying religion and they were so excited Americans came into their mosque that they kindly welcomed us in and weirdly tried to act like they were just like us.  Making excuses for Islamic stuff they did like that they didn’t shake the girls hands because in their culture that was respectful and they respect girls- what a joke! Haha The head guy took us on a tour and we ended up in their huge room of prayer, sitting in a circle talking about religion and politics.  It was seven Christians and one sadly highly deceived Muslim.  He went on and on about different 9/11 theories like that it was impossible for planes to do that and our government probably did it to start the war (kind of like how some people say FDR planned Pearl Harbor I guess).  People also said the Jews did it because their were Muslims in the building too.  Everybody we talked to didn’t know Oklahoma but we would say “its by Texas” and they would be like “Oh Bush!!” He had super bologna, memorized answers to every challenge we threw at him, but I know that all the people around us praying to Allah especially these 3 teenage boys were listening to everything that was being said and it was a glorious time.  I was surprised how many challenges were flying out of my mouth- I couldn’t keep the comments from coming out of my mouth and I know it was totally God.  Thee gave me a Qur’an and his business card so I’m going to be praying for him and maybe emailing!

Challenge:

            In just a short time of being in such a dark place, my nature tendency to doubt the truth of the gospel crept in.  How do I know that my beliefs are true and not these people? Maybe I just believe because I have grown up in it.  If everybody that has always told me about Christ and said they were Christians suddenly said they were not and gave me reasons would I still believe? I was challenged in many ways this trip realizing that before I go to a mission field as dark or maybe darker than Brussels I need to know, know, know what and why I believe what I do.   

Random ministry notes typed up!

    Often time’s ministry in America becomes very focused on the numbers.  We seem to forget that Jesus would challenge people to not become Christians because He knew they were not fit for the kingdom and simply poured into a small group of believers.  Another thing is that it has been so romanticized that when we actually get in the midst of practical ministry we want to quit because we find it is actually hard.  Sheep Stink- ministry would be great with out people (no problems!) Often times you will come along and help them and then they will go back to their old ways… It is typically romanticized- glorified like a war- so exciting but when it really comes down to it, it is so hard so we must just keep persevering.  When it gets hard is where the difference between people who were called and people who thought it sounded fun is seen. 

            Our mission is passion and compassion- we are to love God and to love our neighbor.  If our ministry is not about being a laborer of love we should just simply not minister at all.  My life verse has shown me so so so much about my calling! I cannot believe that one verse can reveal so many different and new things to me throughout the years.  His Word is truly living and active.  “ But when He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary and like sheep without a shepherd.  Then He said to His disciples,  “the harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore, pray to the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His harvest.”  Matthew 9:36-38 Here we see Christ’s compassion and passion for His plentiful harvest and His call to us to pray for God to send out workers! I cannot do it all on my own- it’s God harvest! I feel like in this season of being a missionary in Edmond a lot of what I am to do is to be a learner and to also pray and tell people about this plentiful harvest- about the 2.84 billion people living in unreached people groups or the open doors that are ready to be walked through all around the world! God is doing such a work in the nations.              Ministry must be all about love-everything comes back to love!! Without it- it is nothing! I love this quote about love from mother Teresa: “Love has no meaning if it isn’t shared. Love has to be put into action. You have to love without expectation, do something for love itself, not for what you may receive.” To be true, love must empty itself of self.  Christ was the ultimate minister and sent out one and was basically just pure love walking around on the earth.  If we are sent out by Christ and want our lives to look like His then we will have give everything up and drench ourselves in His limitless love.  “Why go to the ends of the earth if you have nothing to give? The only currency that will cure every culture is ceaseless love… don’t go out to share Him unless you are in love with Him.  When you are in love with Jesus, then all you do will radiate Him.  It is to the degree that you are in love that you radiate Him” – Heidi Baker.  Ministry looks like servanthood manifested through love.  It is us carrying God’s glory by walking, talking… like Jesus and for Jesus only.  To be the very fragrance of Christ, the beauty of Jesus, and the very anointing of Him on earth- that is our job description.  We must give up all that we are to gain all that He is.  The more we minister, the more time we need with Jesus to get filled up so we can pour it back out.  “Missions and ministry are simply about laid-down passion at the foot of the cross, praying, ‘Possess me, Holy Spirit, that I might be conformed into the image of Jesus.  Let me reflect the majesty of who He is.’  Let Jesus love you first so that you can love others as He did.”  If Christ fills us up to the max then when another person meets us, it will be the same as if they were meeting Him.  Ministry is not about where you are or where you go, it is about where Christ is.  When we know God has sent us we will be content and filled with joy no matter where we are or what the circumstances are- we live not for this world!  Ministry is not a competition of misery- we should be the most joyful people in the world.  The point is never the suffering we might come across, but instead it is obedience and wholehearted abandonment to God, whatever the circumstances.  If we want to be miserable we should find another job cause Christ’s love and joy are never ending and are contagious.  “You love until there is pain; you love through the pain, until all that remains is love” – Mother Teresa.

Radical- Intro and Abandonment Notes

“For the sun rises with its scorching heat and withers the grass; its flower falls, and its beauty perishes. So also will the rich man fade away in the midst of his pursuits.” James 1:11 The American Dream.   Throughout my seventeen years of growing up in the number one suburb in America this term has become an increasingly heartbreaking term to me.  I have watched my family, my friends, and myself get caught up in comforts, materialism, and self-advancement and thus completely deceived by Satan to be useless to God and led blindly down a hell bound race.  We are so caught up in getting to the next step in life that we seem to miss it all.  When Mr. Caldwell suggested I read this book I honestly thought: “oh I already have such a passion for this I don’t need anymore fuel.” But as a have begun to read this book I have realized just how much I still have to learn and so excited to finish this book and live a life in more complete abandonment to Christ.

Abandonment: “I could not help but think that somewhere along the way we had missed what is radical about our faith and replaced it with what is comfortable.  We were settling for a Christianity that revolves around catering to ourselves when the central message of Christianity is actually about abandoning ourselves.”  Jesus makes it clear in the Bible that to follow him means the complete abandonment of everything- our needs, our desires/dreams, and our families.  When we choose to believe in Jesus we are then faced with the next question- will we obey Jesus?  Will we be too lazy, timid, complacent or whatever else it is that might prevent us from following Jesus or will we simply listen and submissively and faithfully obey the words of Jesus: “follow me?”  When we start to really think about Jesus’ radical words they sound very crazy and would have taken a lot of faith to follow.  I say ‘would have’ considering when He first said them, but when we actually begin to meditate on his word’s meanings I think that we as Christians will find it actually very hard to follow also.  We have numbed everything down and made excuses to things Jesus told people to do, (‘what he really meant here was...”) and thus live lives of disobedience.  We are starting to redefine Christianity and are giving into the dangerous temptation of taking the Jesus of the Bible and twisting him into a version of Jesus we are more comfortable with.  We are trying to mold Jesus into our image and thus when we worship we may be instead worshipping ourselves.  How did we get to this place where it is actually tolerable to spend so much time and money on comforts for ourselves when so many are dying destined to a Christless eternity.  When we actually begin to live out the words of Christ for an eternal treasure the world will think we are crazy.  But we know that we are actually not giving up anything but gaining in the end.  Because we have found something worth losing it all for- we abandon it all with joy!!! I want to be proof that people who are naturally drawn to the comforts of the American dream can be converted to a radical faith in a radical Savior.